Section 1 – Introduction to OCD
- Book: Unshackle from Incest OCD
- Author: Dr. Sunil Punjabi
Hello, and welcome to this course book, Unshackle from Incest OCD. This is the fifth book in the series on unshackling from various types of OCD. I am Sunil Punjabi, the author of this book and also the other four books on OCD (Overcoming ROCD, Unshackle from Harm OCD, Unshackle from POCD, and Unshackle from Religious OCD). To briefly introduce myself, I am an ex-media professional who wandered into the field of psychological counseling by a cruel but interesting quirk of fate. Nineteen years ago (in 2006), my wife of twenty-three years was diagnosed with OCD. And very severe OCD at that. She was diagnosed with Contamination OCD and her rituals and compulsions were the stuff that nightmares are made of. For the longest time, we did not know what to do, and we went from pillar to post trying to find help for her. To be a supportive husband, I accompanied her to all the doctors and therapists that we could find, read up and researched extensively on OCD, and left no stone unturned in trying to get her to feel better. We even moved cities and got her treated at one of the best facilities for OCD in India, at NIMHANS, Bangalore. My first book, ‘Ctrl Alt Repeat,’ is a slice of my life, which depicts our experience in trying to fight the disorder and the impact it has on a family.
Through this journey with my wife, though, I developed an interest in understanding not just OCD well but also pursuing psychology professionally to help others. After unofficially helping people out on internet forums for some time, I eventually enrolled in and completed my second Master’s—in Clinical Psychology—and also did a certification course in CBT. I studied up on exposure and response prevention (ERP), the gold standard in the treatment of OCD, and got to understand its nuances. I also did my doctorate, not in clinical psychology, but in business. My thesis was focused on introducing people with high-functioning OCD into the mainstream workforce—a sort of blend between organizational psychology and clinical psychology. Over the years, I started my private practice—Unshackle Counselling—and although I practice general counselling, I also provide coaching for ERP in OCD, and hence this book, to help you deal with your Incest OCD.
Incest OCD is that subtype of OCD in which the person has an excessive fear of acting sexually with family members. In Incest OCD, the person’s love for their family becomes their curse. Because of Incest OCD, if they love their parent/sibling/child, they may get sexual thoughts about their parent/sibling/child or the fear that they may be sexually attracted to their parent/sibling/child. This will cause them anxiety and begin to impact everyday functioning.
If you struggle with Incest OCD, I offer you help for the same through this course book. This is not a textbook. You will not find endless research and unhelpful textbook suggestions in this book. I have documented tricks and strategies through analogies and metaphors that I use in my practice so that even the ‘how’ of the recovery process is answered, not just the ‘what’ and ‘why.’ I have tried to maintain correctness of information in this book with the least amount of jargon. The language in the book is simple, and even non-native English speakers should be able to understand it. My intention is to talk to you, talk you through your struggles, and walk with you in your recovery journey rather than preach to you from the sidelines.
One word of caution straight off the bat, though. The examples in the book, when describing the obsessions and compulsions of people with Incest OCD may be graphic. However, please note that this is an attempt to get as close to the Incest OCD sufferer’s mind as possible to offer the best possible help. The objective is not to offend. If I sidestep the issue without getting into the details, the procedure may not be very effective.
The examples may also be triggering for some people with Incest OCD. That, however, is a risk we have to take in a book of this nature. The recovery process does require facing triggers, and a book designed to help people with Incest OCD recover cannot shy away from doing the right thing.
This course book is designed to make your caregivers, friends, family members, and loved ones (referred to simply as “family” going forward) more aware of Incest OCD. Even though OCD afflicts one person, the effect it can have on family cannot be understated. Family members are often clueless on how to help, leading them to enable and thereby strengthen your OCD. Or they may end up pushing you away out of either frustration, shock, or disgust. Breakups, ruined relationships, social isolation, and divorces are common where one person has OCD in the family. Hence, getting a thorough understanding of how Incest OCD works is critical, even for the family.
Through this course book, you will learn that the power to not do the compulsions is in your hands. You will learn ways to identify your various triggers, obsessions, and compulsions, and how to overcome this disorder through response prevention while managing your anxiety. In this course book, I provide a step-by-step process for understanding and implementing exposure and response prevention (ERP), along with the principles of acceptance and mindfulness, to help you deal with your Incest OCD.
What I present to you may be simple to understand but is not simple to implement, especially if you are trying to implement it on your own. Hence, there are two critical requirements if you want the course book to work for you. One, do not just read the course book to complete it and tick off one more book you have read on Incest OCD, (a false sense of accomplishment that you are doing something to get better). OCD does not get better even if you read all the books ever written on it, just as you won’t learn to play cricket even if you read all the books there are on the subject. Hence, read to understand. Internalize. If you do not understand anything, reread. Read it as many times as you need to understand it well. If anything is still unclear, reach out to me at [email protected], and I will attempt to clarify your doubts.
Two, practice, practice, practice! If you only read the course book cursorily, without practicing, it will help in getting a different perspective but may not help much in the improvement of your symptoms. The magic of this book is in the implementation.
You will also find practice worksheets at the end of some of the chapters. Use them well. Use them extensively and keep monitoring yourself. Print the worksheets and make additional copies when needed. Constant practice using the worksheets will help more than mere reading may. If you can get your family involved in the process, even better. Their involvement may serve as an encouragement that you are not alone in this journey and may give you the support you need to keep practicing in a non-judgmental environment.
There is an MS-Excel workbook called ‘Worksheets for Incest OCD’ that has all these practice worksheets (in case you prefer the digital version), six psychometric tests (not available in the course book), and a dashboard sheet that you can download from www.unshackle.in/freebies/. (On certain devices though, the downloaded MS-Excel workbook may show up as ‘Read Only,’ and you may have to click on the ‘Enable Editing’ button on your devices).
The first psychometric test is for your family to determine if any of the members accommodate your OCD and to what extent. The other five psychometric tests measure the presence and severity of your OCD, assess your mindfulness, understand your acceptance levels, check how compassionate you are toward yourself, and test your insight, respectively. All these tests are self-administered and free-to-use tests. In some cases, the scores have been adapted to suit replication on a spreadsheet, without any change in the scoring methodology. Please note, however, that the tests are not to be used as diagnostic tools. The diagnosis can only be made by a mental health professional. These tests should be considered as an indicator for further checkup or for confirmation of a pre-existing diagnosis.
The last sheet in the Worksheets file is a visual dashboard. The graphical representation and the consolidated scores of five psychometric tests will show up on this sheet. Cells corresponding to a test in the Inference column will change color when the test is completed. Red is undesirable, and green is desirable. Your endeavor would be to work on yourself to turn all reds and oranges into greens.
You will also find some additional reading resources at the end of some chapters that are instrumental to your recovery. I urge you to read these too and use the information provided in them. Your commitment to implementation will make a big difference. So, do commit to the completion and extensive practice of the course. If you have the right attitude for beating your Incest OCD and are willing to put in the effort, this course book will definitely help you in your recovery process.
If you have not read the Limit of Liability/Disclaimer of Warranty statement before choosing this course book, it is provided as Additional Resource 1.1. Kindly read through it now.
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